I bitch. I bitch and I bitch, and I bitch.
Like Dr House, I have two philosophies about humanity in general: "Everybody lies" and "People are idiots".
5. Noise.
I hate noise. Hate it. Most of it is pretty unnescessary as well, I think that's what's bothering me the most. That someone could have avoided waking me up at night, but couldn't be bothered.
4. Illness.
I am a pretty sick person, physically. I have a crappy immune-system, the joints of a 60-year-old, and enough allergies to fit the stereotype "nerd" perfectly. And, I must admit, I bitch about it alot.
3. Spelling.
Like I've mentioned before, I find spelling below your capability to be extremely lazy and rude, and almost nothing annoys me more than people who just can't be bothered to even try. Unless there's a timed bomb next to you, those one-and-a-half seconds you lose by typing out the words fully won't do you any good.
2. Teenagers.
Their clothes are crap, their music is crap, they spell like crap, and they treat those around them like crap. Their world consists of black and white, hate and love, and durrrrrraaama.
They act like children because their brains haven't fully grown yet, and still, they insist on being treated like adults.
Don't tell me not to be condescending if you can't talk to me like you're an adult!
1. Human behaviour.
Woooow, didn't see that coming, did you?
Like Sheldon Cooper and so many misfit nerds before him, human behaviour tends to baffle and repulse me, and I find social conventions intimidating, exessive and intriguing. I love love LOVE to bitch about why humans do this and that, and I never get any wiser.
Monday 27 February 2012
Friday 18 November 2011
The top 5 things to do if you want to seem like an ignorant weirdo.
As the title is pretty self-explanatory, let's progress with the list.
- Number 5. Walk with a pimp-limp.
When did it become cool and pimpin' to walk like your mother smoked crack during pregnancy? If you have perfectly fine legs, walk accordingly!
- Number 4. Chew gum with an open mouth.
I know it's a petty thing to bitch about, but people really look like they have disfigured jaws when they go at that gum like there's no tomorrow. Keep your mouth shut and your germs to yourself, please.
- Number 3. Mis-spell things purposedly.
Now, I make some mistakes here and there, but I correct them. They are unintentional. When people misspell things while perfectly aware of it, it really grinds my gears. Why write "wat u up 2 gurl" what you can write "Hey girl, what's up?" Show the person you're messaging a little respect, and if it's on Face... Show the people who have to decipher your crappy updates some respect. People who can't spell despite their best efforts, I can respect. People who make no effort whatsoever to even try... Are freakin dumb.
- Number 2. Hold the handsfree up to your mouth.
I've seen tons of people here use the handsfree like they would use the phone. They plug in the earplug, and they hold the microphone up to speak into it. Some even hold the end of the phone up to talk into it, while wearing the earplug. Isn't the meaning of 'hands-free' that you're NOT supposed to be using your hands? Why don't you clip the microphones to your oversized scarves and use the handsfree like your brain has activity, you morons?
- Number 1. Walk without swinging your arms.
This is not angering, it is just sad. Swinging your arms is natural, and it seems natural to me that people would swing their arms while walking. When I see people who purposedly try to keep their arms still by just letting them hang down by the side, it creeps me the frick out. It's like seeing some sort of bigfoot stomp by. It looks eerie and unnatural, but I know why they do it. I've been there, man. You're so aware of yourself that you stop swinging your arms in order to be more invisible, not knowing that by doing so, you are making yourself very, very visible. And looking very clumsy.
Angry femmenerd, over and out.
Peace, yo.
- Number 5. Walk with a pimp-limp.
When did it become cool and pimpin' to walk like your mother smoked crack during pregnancy? If you have perfectly fine legs, walk accordingly!
- Number 4. Chew gum with an open mouth.
I know it's a petty thing to bitch about, but people really look like they have disfigured jaws when they go at that gum like there's no tomorrow. Keep your mouth shut and your germs to yourself, please.
- Number 3. Mis-spell things purposedly.
Now, I make some mistakes here and there, but I correct them. They are unintentional. When people misspell things while perfectly aware of it, it really grinds my gears. Why write "wat u up 2 gurl" what you can write "Hey girl, what's up?" Show the person you're messaging a little respect, and if it's on Face... Show the people who have to decipher your crappy updates some respect. People who can't spell despite their best efforts, I can respect. People who make no effort whatsoever to even try... Are freakin dumb.
- Number 2. Hold the handsfree up to your mouth.
I've seen tons of people here use the handsfree like they would use the phone. They plug in the earplug, and they hold the microphone up to speak into it. Some even hold the end of the phone up to talk into it, while wearing the earplug. Isn't the meaning of 'hands-free' that you're NOT supposed to be using your hands? Why don't you clip the microphones to your oversized scarves and use the handsfree like your brain has activity, you morons?
- Number 1. Walk without swinging your arms.
This is not angering, it is just sad. Swinging your arms is natural, and it seems natural to me that people would swing their arms while walking. When I see people who purposedly try to keep their arms still by just letting them hang down by the side, it creeps me the frick out. It's like seeing some sort of bigfoot stomp by. It looks eerie and unnatural, but I know why they do it. I've been there, man. You're so aware of yourself that you stop swinging your arms in order to be more invisible, not knowing that by doing so, you are making yourself very, very visible. And looking very clumsy.
Angry femmenerd, over and out.
Peace, yo.
Friday 4 November 2011
Top 5 songs I like listening to in the autumn.
The autumn sort of triggers a poetic and melancholic mood in us all, doesn't it? For those of us who live on the northern hemisphere, the autumn comes with a decrease of sunlight and warmth, and misty twilights. It causes me to have dreams of dragons and scary woods, I don't know about you guys.
Anyways, the autumn causes a temporary change in taste for me. It can be anything from food, to partners, to clothes, to music.
Therefore, here are the top 5 songs I like to listen to in the autumn:
Honourable mention number 2. Counting Crows - Mrs Potter's lullaby
Anyways, the autumn causes a temporary change in taste for me. It can be anything from food, to partners, to clothes, to music.
Therefore, here are the top 5 songs I like to listen to in the autumn:
Number 5. Slipknot - Duality
You know, the summer leaves me all energized and reharged, causing me to become really docile and happy. As the autumn progresses and the sun turns away, a darker side of me emerges, almost a different persona. I've learned to keep her controlled over the years and keep myself happy no matter what it takes, but sometimes I do run into conflict that causes me to have some steam to let out. After these conflicts, I like to get on my bike and ride as long and fast as I can while listening to this song. Afterwards, I always come back steam-free and happy. I'm easy to please and hard to piss off.
Number 4. Counting Crows feat. Vanessa Carlton - Big, yellow taxi
You know, when the cold hands of late fall enters and whisks away the last leaves with its icey bursts of wind, people, including yours truly, tend to get really bummed out about nature dying. I've been a student for most of my life, including this year, and the schools always choose this time of year to teach us about pollution and stuff. This song sort of helps me deal with the feeling of helpless guilt over my race, the oh-so-might human race. If we're so smart, why are we the only ones who are aware that they're killing the earth and yet the only ones who does nothing to stop it?
Anyways. Counting Crows are big favourites of mine, and so is Vanessa Carlton. Those are GREAT together! If this was a top 10 list, you'd see some more of their songs as well. Sadly, it isn't.
Number 3. Mew - Apocalypso
Despite speaking both English and this guy's mother tongue, Danish, I cannot for the life of me figure out much of the lyrics. It is awesome to listen to during late fall or early winter when it is dark outside and a storm is raging. Also great for angry bikerides, by the way! Which I have yet to take this year, due to my bike being stolen. I guess I learned that lesson.
Anyways, I love the depth of this song, it really causes my inner imagination and stuff to make me feel as if I an standing in a windy feel with really dark clouds in front of an even darker sky and the wind is raging, showing especially in the fields of wheat. Great and powerful!
Number 2. New Radicals - Crying like a church on monday
New radicals are just great. The frontman, and for that matter, guy behind it all, is Gregg Alexander. I'm a big fan of all his work, and that of Danielle Brisebois as well. What they have in common is also the reason I like them; they have such honest voices. They might not have chrystal-clear voices, but what they lack in tones, they make up for in passion and honesty, something you rarely see in singers these days. They are both still active, mostly by writing and/or producing for other artists.
Anyways, this album was a great collaboration of masterminds, and I think this song is the most well-made song on the album. The passion, the calmness, the honesty, I mean... Whether you're in love, lovesick, or just reminiscing, this song will just move you and sweep you away. I sometimes just fall in love with being in love and start to miss being lovesick, isn't that something?
A huge dream of mine is to become good enough to play the guitar and find a partner to play with, and then perform this song somehwere like a church or on stage. It would make me so happy.
Number 1. Death Cab for Cutie - Soul meets body
This song is great for taking penisve walks in the early afternoons when the pale rays of sun peek down from far away behind the trees, and you can see your own breath evaporaing in the air.
It just puts me in such a philosophical mood, and I often pracice walking meditation. I will put on calm, yet rhythmic music like this, and no matter how long I walk, when I return... I feel as if I've only been gone for five minutes, as well as if my head has been cleared. You should try it.
This is also great for anyone having any feeling related to love, whether it's longing for it or being in it. Enjoy.
Honourable mention:
I have two honourable mentions this time, both being by Counting Crows.
The first one is 'Mr. Jones', and I just love it. It puts me in sort of a bittersweet melancholic-like mood, but it lifts me up. And I just love the dancing in the video! I love the fact that Counting Crows have such a good energy. They write about feeling numb and sad in a way that makes you feel better rather than worse. Maybe just because of being reassured there are others out there who feel the same way. I think 'Mr. Jones' is sort of a representation of a darker side of him, and that by "the father", he means himself, the creator of this dark beast. But what do I know.
Honourable Mention number 1. Counting Crows - Mr. Jones:
I love the verse where he sings about painting. I'm somewhat of a painter myself, as well as a writer, and i do my best work in the winter. Arts are a very healthy way of channeling any residual negative energy.
The second song is longer, and despite the lyrics being a little numbing/saddening, they're very relatable, and the easygoing rhythm lifts you right out of any dark place you might be in.
Honourable mention number 2. Counting Crows - Mrs Potter's lullaby
I know, "what's with the names?". I honestly have no idea, bro. I love this song. As I sad, it's sort of bittersweet in a very light and sort of uplifting way, and you don't even notice how long it is.
Well, that's it for now, folks. Happy halloween and thanksgiving and whatnot!
Saturday 15 October 2011
My top 5 favourite songs to listen to when I'm in a good mood. (With links!)
Sometimes I'm in a great mood, and I want to feel even better. Or, I'm not in such a great mood and wanting to change that.
These are the songs I like to listen to:
(Do yourselves a favour and listen to them with headphones to make sure you get all of the nuances.)
Number 5 - Jean Jacques Perrey - 'Schwing'
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=urfaO5ZmMMQ)
'Schwing' is made on a moog, an old electronic instrument they used in the 80's to make funky electro music.
Number 4 - DJ Sasha - 'Magnetic North'
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PrD_42qodoQ)
This is a wordless trance-piece that is I feel is deep, relaxing and rhythmic. It makes me feel like I am on a train, driving through space and the ocean.
Number 3 - Lemon Jelly - 'Space walk'
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sVCB3qpplLk)
This piece is so calm (despite its rough start), and it fills me with positive energy. I feel as if I'm just drifting off into space, leaving all my worries behind. It always leaves me with a big smile on my face. :)
(... Just don't try and read the history about the astronaut whose voice they used, it will kill your good mood)
Number 2 - Bobby McFerrin - 'Don't worry, be happy'
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d-diB65scQU&ob=av3e)
Such an inspirational song. The lyrics are so uplifting, and reminds me to just forget about my troubles and relax. Oh, and also, Robin Williams, the comedian is in the video!
Number 1 - New Radicals - 'You get what you give'
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DL7-CKirWZE&ob=av2e)
My most favourite song of all time. I remember hearing it several times during the end of the 90's and the beginning of 00's in the radio, but I never figured out who made it. Then, in 2009, I downloaded the soundtrack to the entire 5 first season of Scrubs, and another song by New Radicals was on there. I searched for them on youtube, and this song came up. 2 years later, I'm a hardcore fan of all of Gregg Alexander and Danielle Brisebois's work. This song is so energetic and uplifting, and it makes me feel awesome each time. And the bass is so cool!
These are the songs I like to listen to:
(Do yourselves a favour and listen to them with headphones to make sure you get all of the nuances.)
Number 5 - Jean Jacques Perrey - 'Schwing'
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=urfaO5ZmMMQ)
'Schwing' is made on a moog, an old electronic instrument they used in the 80's to make funky electro music.
Number 4 - DJ Sasha - 'Magnetic North'
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PrD_42qodoQ)
This is a wordless trance-piece that is I feel is deep, relaxing and rhythmic. It makes me feel like I am on a train, driving through space and the ocean.
Number 3 - Lemon Jelly - 'Space walk'
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sVCB3qpplLk)
This piece is so calm (despite its rough start), and it fills me with positive energy. I feel as if I'm just drifting off into space, leaving all my worries behind. It always leaves me with a big smile on my face. :)
(... Just don't try and read the history about the astronaut whose voice they used, it will kill your good mood)
Number 2 - Bobby McFerrin - 'Don't worry, be happy'
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d-diB65scQU&ob=av3e)
Such an inspirational song. The lyrics are so uplifting, and reminds me to just forget about my troubles and relax. Oh, and also, Robin Williams, the comedian is in the video!
Number 1 - New Radicals - 'You get what you give'
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DL7-CKirWZE&ob=av2e)
My most favourite song of all time. I remember hearing it several times during the end of the 90's and the beginning of 00's in the radio, but I never figured out who made it. Then, in 2009, I downloaded the soundtrack to the entire 5 first season of Scrubs, and another song by New Radicals was on there. I searched for them on youtube, and this song came up. 2 years later, I'm a hardcore fan of all of Gregg Alexander and Danielle Brisebois's work. This song is so energetic and uplifting, and it makes me feel awesome each time. And the bass is so cool!
My top 5 favourite runnnig gags in 'Family Guy'
Number 5 - Cleveland.
Cleveland in himself is just one big running gag, and he takes part in most of the other ones. Like when he says "Oh no!" or his house is blown up by peter and he goes "no no no no NO!" while he slides down in his bathtub.
Number 4 - 'That guy who likes everything'.
He is also just one big running gag. I just love the way he talks!
Number 3 - When peter hurts his knee.
A running gag in the 'Family guy' series is when someone falls and hurts their knee, and then grab it repeatedly.
It started when peter fell and hit his knee, and kept grabbing it while going "Hh-aaaaaarh..." over and over again.
Number 2 - When stewie does somethnig gay.
Seth MacFarlane said they made Stewie's sexually undefined on purpose, and I just love it when Stewie does or says gay stuff. He is so adorable!
Number 1 - When Peter does 'Surfin bird'.
He actually does it in several episodes, and it just cracks me up every time!
Family Guy is awesome!
Honourable mention: Conzuela.
She is so funny!
Cleveland in himself is just one big running gag, and he takes part in most of the other ones. Like when he says "Oh no!" or his house is blown up by peter and he goes "no no no no NO!" while he slides down in his bathtub.
Number 4 - 'That guy who likes everything'.
He is also just one big running gag. I just love the way he talks!
Number 3 - When peter hurts his knee.
A running gag in the 'Family guy' series is when someone falls and hurts their knee, and then grab it repeatedly.
It started when peter fell and hit his knee, and kept grabbing it while going "Hh-aaaaaarh..." over and over again.
Number 2 - When stewie does somethnig gay.
Seth MacFarlane said they made Stewie's sexually undefined on purpose, and I just love it when Stewie does or says gay stuff. He is so adorable!
Number 1 - When Peter does 'Surfin bird'.
He actually does it in several episodes, and it just cracks me up every time!
Family Guy is awesome!
Honourable mention: Conzuela.
She is so funny!
Saturday 8 October 2011
My top 5 favourite flavours of ice-cream
Number 5 - Caramel
Chocolatey goodness *drool*
Number 4 - Red Berries
Anything that has anything to do with blackberries or raspberries
Number 3 - Pistachio
Tastes like a lovely mixture between marzipan and play-dough.
Number 2 - Vanilla
It might be too regular, but I tend to like the unsoiled flavour of pure vanilla icecream.
Number 1 - Cookie dough
Hey, it's a real thing! It's from Ben & Jerry's, the company that makes the best darn icecream in the entire world! It's vanilly icecream with chunks of cookie-dough in it!
Needless to say, I was very disappointed to find out the icecream in itself was not, in fact, cookie dough flavoured, but it is still my favourite icecream.
Chocolatey goodness *drool*
Number 4 - Red Berries
Anything that has anything to do with blackberries or raspberries
Number 3 - Pistachio
Tastes like a lovely mixture between marzipan and play-dough.
Number 2 - Vanilla
It might be too regular, but I tend to like the unsoiled flavour of pure vanilla icecream.
Number 1 - Cookie dough
Hey, it's a real thing! It's from Ben & Jerry's, the company that makes the best darn icecream in the entire world! It's vanilly icecream with chunks of cookie-dough in it!
Needless to say, I was very disappointed to find out the icecream in itself was not, in fact, cookie dough flavoured, but it is still my favourite icecream.
Friday 7 October 2011
My top 5 strange criterias for a partner
When I look at someone as a potential partner, they need to pass some criteria.
Some are obvious, like good hygiene and great communication-skills, but others are just plain strange.
Most of these involves the need for common interests, but as you might already know; my interests are pretty strange.
Number 5 - Has to understand why I think the music I like is great
I see good taste in music as a sign of intelligence, and I am just arrogant and aware of my intelligence enough to consider my taste strange, but good. I have the ability to see the skill and talent in what I think is good music, and I need my potential partner to be able to do the same. This might also be why I have a thing for musiscians, but who knows.
Number 4 - Has to like science
I like science. I LOVE science. A potential partner doesn't have to be good at it, but he/she/they need to be able to appreciate science as much as I do.
Number 3 - Has to like Pokèmon
As I explained in my previous blog post, I quite enjoy pokèmon for many reasons.
If my partner can't understand why I enjoy Pokèmon... Well, then there's a fundamental conflict of interest.
Number 2 - Dental hygiene.
Yeah, something that attracts me a lot to a person is the teeth. The position of the teeth, how they shape the mouth, everything about it. Good dental hygiene and great teeth are a sign of health and good genes, which also appeals to the instincts of the human race. I just can't bring myself to kiss nor date someone who doesn't even care about something as important as their teeth.
Number 1 - Has to like Star Wars and understand why it beats Star Trek in every way.
Star Wars is freaking great. Star Trek is lame. This is why.
I have met people who have not even HEARD about Star Wars, and it has made me want to kick them in the shin.
Granted, the last two movies were horrible, and don't get me started on "Lego Star Wars", but the old movies are a gem! A treasure! And did you know George Lucas had written more scripts, but as he saw how Hollywood, greedy for profits, butchered the newer films, he decided it wasn't worth it.
Oh, and when it comes to Star Trek... That show is so boring! The aliens are just humans with extra foreheads or monobrows, and their pseudo-science is boring and confusing. Besides, their weapons are totally lame compared to lightsabers, and they don't even have telekinetic powers like the Jedies!
I like plausible Sci-fi, and though Star Wars isn't that more plausible than Star Trek, it still has more... Realism behind it, more... Depth.
Some are obvious, like good hygiene and great communication-skills, but others are just plain strange.
Most of these involves the need for common interests, but as you might already know; my interests are pretty strange.
Number 5 - Has to understand why I think the music I like is great
I see good taste in music as a sign of intelligence, and I am just arrogant and aware of my intelligence enough to consider my taste strange, but good. I have the ability to see the skill and talent in what I think is good music, and I need my potential partner to be able to do the same. This might also be why I have a thing for musiscians, but who knows.
Number 4 - Has to like science
I like science. I LOVE science. A potential partner doesn't have to be good at it, but he/she/they need to be able to appreciate science as much as I do.
Number 3 - Has to like Pokèmon
As I explained in my previous blog post, I quite enjoy pokèmon for many reasons.
If my partner can't understand why I enjoy Pokèmon... Well, then there's a fundamental conflict of interest.
Number 2 - Dental hygiene.
Yeah, something that attracts me a lot to a person is the teeth. The position of the teeth, how they shape the mouth, everything about it. Good dental hygiene and great teeth are a sign of health and good genes, which also appeals to the instincts of the human race. I just can't bring myself to kiss nor date someone who doesn't even care about something as important as their teeth.
Number 1 - Has to like Star Wars and understand why it beats Star Trek in every way.
Star Wars is freaking great. Star Trek is lame. This is why.
I have met people who have not even HEARD about Star Wars, and it has made me want to kick them in the shin.
Granted, the last two movies were horrible, and don't get me started on "Lego Star Wars", but the old movies are a gem! A treasure! And did you know George Lucas had written more scripts, but as he saw how Hollywood, greedy for profits, butchered the newer films, he decided it wasn't worth it.
Oh, and when it comes to Star Trek... That show is so boring! The aliens are just humans with extra foreheads or monobrows, and their pseudo-science is boring and confusing. Besides, their weapons are totally lame compared to lightsabers, and they don't even have telekinetic powers like the Jedies!
I like plausible Sci-fi, and though Star Wars isn't that more plausible than Star Trek, it still has more... Realism behind it, more... Depth.
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